I want to feel that way again,
How I felt when you hold my hand at Senayan when we were crossing over the street. How you saw me the first time at Senayan, when stayed at coffee shop talking about random stuff for hours, then forgetting that we already bought tickets for movie and were late because of that. How you first hug me. How you hold me from the back every time I’m sleeping next to you and kissed me the next morning with a big mug of hot tea on your hands.
How we didn’t have to say anything to completed our sentences. How we both look like brother and sister. How I first laugh to your unfunny and corny jokes. How I first cried because of you. How we coped up with our short temper and fucked up attitude. How I’m dying because of you a year ago and told me not to worry. How we promised to ourselves to fight our disease. How you helped me a lot in my hard times.
How you told me we will be living together and have a lots of dogs with no kids, no marriage. How pleasant you look every single second with white shirt. How I felt when you told me that I’m a wonderful person and be grateful for having me around, that you never care and love anyone in your whole life before like you love and care for me now.. How I gave you everything. How I’m really proud of you with everything you have. How I miss you and need you more than anything in my life. How I love you with all my heart, that you have shown me a lot of things I’ve never experienced before... and how I thank you sincerely for all of that.
Everything John, I want it all back. Remember when this was everything? In a way, it still is. I want to feel that way again.
But to want you back is just another selfish act for me, because I know you are a lot more happier in your place now. Yet I know I didn't lose you because I feel you every time I need you... you're always around and I feel safe.
Safe journey there, Love. I'm still keeping this promise that I will love you forever so dearly, no matter what happen.
Rest In Peace,
Johnny Boy (1982 - 2010)
19.9.10
“Because you’re not right in the head, and nor I am… and this is why I like you.”
14.4.10
Tentara Merah Darah
Green Café, Kemang, Jakarta
February 21, 2010
My friend asked me to take a photo of his own band, Siksa Kubur for launch party of the fifth album 'Tentara Merah Darah'. I said yes, since they were like my favorite death metal band here so i can't see why not. Taking the concept of 300 movie along with the screening of its movie, they began to destroy the stage.. the crowd were all went nuts and brutal. The rest of it, i can't really remember cuz i was kinda stoned haha. Luckily i still got my energy to do so, then it's all good. Overall it's an awesome night concert indeed!
Thanks to Andre for all the kindness, it's an honor to be a part of this.
also check out the Rolling Stone magz review about the concert HERE (in Indonesian).
5.1.10
Magrudergrind
Work Hard Mosh Hard #2 (July 2008)
Stardust café, Sarinah Building 14th floor, Jakarta.
2 years agooo, i know!! well there's more that i haven't posted yet: Extreme Noise Terror, Walls Of Jericho, Sick Of It All, and some local bands.
guess i'm just waaaay too lazy or maybe cuz of those band performed on a huge stage, i mean really huge and wide with all the marvelous lights and stuff.
i hate it. i don't know... i'm always bad with big stage.
